Grr! Argh!

(Please Note: the title of this post has entirely nothing to do with its contents.)

Confession time: I’ve been playing with the idea of renaming this blog. The singing part? Frankly, it’s not happening right now. Not that I haven’t tried, but even with 65+ lbs gone, no one’s hiring. Thing is, I love singing. Seriously, I sing all.the.freaking.time. In my car? Yep. Decorating the Christmas Tree? Yep. Sitting at my desk at work without even realizing I’m doing it? Yep.

Now, I get nothing but good feedback from my auditions, and can usually count on a callback, but – in the end – it’s the director’s decision. When you have a sea of fifty women who are all equally good, it always comes down to looks and personal taste. When you’re the only one or one of two larger women called back, unless you are so completely frakking spectacular (like fireworks are going off when you sing and a Souza March playing in the background), and there’s a smaller person to cast – guess who it’s gonna be?

Really, though, I’m okay with it. It’s been giving me plenty of time to focus on what I’m doing right now. And find other ways to get my singing in public fix.

That fix has recently come by going out to karaoke bars, not too often, but every couple of weeks. There’s this great one I go to Monday nights that isn’t too packed, and I can crank out a good five or six songs between 8:30 p.m. and midnight. Grab a couple girlfriends, a couple of beers, and you have one great night out. But wild horses couldn’t drag the DH out.

I used to get my singing in public fix at this one place in Sunnyvale that closed down a year or so back. Gah, I miss it soooo much. The restaurant – Cattleman’s – had a Thursday and Friday night open mic jazz night in the bar, piano player provided. Sometimes a drummer would sit in, and from time to time a stand-up bass player. All you had to do was bring lead sheets enough for the band and get up to sing. This was freaking heaven. I loooove singing jazz. It’s fun, it’s totally different from classical music, and it gives your improvisation chops a serious workout.

However, when I look at what I’m doing singing-wise now, I can’t help but be disappointed. There’s this little part of me that worries if I suck, if people are just humoring me, or if they don’t want me around. It’s just a little bit paranoid, but I was doing so well there for a while.

At the same time, I can’t fixate on this. There is more to me than singing and weight loss (there’s beer! HAHAHAHA!). Sometimes I worry if I’ve pigeon-holed myself into talking ONLY about singing and weight-loss related activities, and that makes Zan a Dull Girl.

Here’s your warning. There might be a name change here in the near future, so don’t be scared.

And, while I’m at it, here’s yesterday’s food tracker:

Wednesday’s Meal Tracker:

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Daily PointsPlus Target: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 39
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 18
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

Stairs, 3 Activity Points Earned
Biggest Loser Cardio Max, 7 Activity Points Earned

Green Monster Smoothie – 3 Points
Yep, the Points went up. I started adding a whole cup of Light Soymilk and less water.

Morning Snack:
2 Archer Farms Organic Strawberry Fruit Strips – 2 Points

Eating Right Black Bean Soup – 4 Points
Archer Farms Organic Strawberry Fruit Strip – 1 Point
Baby Carrots – 0 Points
Ranch Dressing, 2 tsp – 1 Point

Afternoon Snack:
Yoplait Light Strawberry Yogurt – 3 Points

Round Table, Skinny Crust, Guinevere’s Garden Delight Personal Pizza – 12 Points
DH’s Pizza crusts – 7 Points

Hershey’s Chocolate Miniature, 2 pieces – 2 Points

Daily PointsPlus Eaten: 35
Weekly PointsPlus Remaining: 39
Weekly Activity Points Earned: 28
Weekly Activity Points Used: 0

I can’t tell you how happy I am that I didn’t dip into my weekly points. The DH and I are going to a work-related Holiday Party tomorrow after work, then after that my usual pub night out with friends. Probably equals a good 10 or 12 point dip into the Weekly Points.

And on an entirely different note, I should think twice about doing two different Bob Harper workouts in two days. That man loves lunges so much, and I hate them, so do my calves. Ugh. So sore, but at least it’s a good sore.

Have a good one folks.

About singingforasmallerme

I'm just a girl doing a thing. A little sarcastic, a little cynical, and a total sassbot. Nothing's off limits here, but my primary focus is weight loss. Still, you might find commentary on anything ranging from makeup to music to fashion to beer and dancing.
This entry was posted in Ramblings, The Fourth Twenty Pounds, theatre, Weight loss and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Grr! Argh!

  1. Billie says:

    Come over to! I’m not an opera gal, but I do love to sing, and since I don’t go out anymore, this is where I get my karaoke fix. Enjoying your blog. =)


  2. Shardaun Gerard says:

    I stumbled across your blog today whilst trying to find weight watchers points values for karaokeing. no, no points found. But I did find you! W
    my fam and I live in Sunnyvale. WE LOVE to karaoke. No, we aren’t that good or anything, but it has become our fav thing to do. So I saw our similar interests and thought making contact would be a good thing! You can always find me on facebook, I believe I am the only Shardaun on there.

    • Thanks for saying hi!!! I actually used to go to WW in Sunnyvale on Wednesday night’s until my leader left (boo!). It’s great meeting other locals here doing some of the same things. Hmm, maybe I’ll wear my HRM the next time I karaoke and see how much I burn!! XD

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